Deeweedee of the Week: Death On Demand

We got an overwhelming response of five comments on the last Deeweedee of the Week so we decided to do another.  Here it goes:

Title: Death On Demand

Plot Summary: An entrepreneurial college student decides to set up a pay-per-view live webcast of six people spending the night in a haunted house.  Who's haunting it?  I'm glad you asked.  Turns out thirty years earlier, a mountaineer climbing Everest went crazy from a cerebral edema and killed his Sherpa.  After returning home, he brutally murdered his wife and kids using mountaineering equipment, then hung himself from a climbing rope.  The contestants, split into teams of two, must embark on a sort of a scavenger hunt that slowly reveals more details about the grisly night in question and ultimately leads them to the key to the padlocked front door and the cash prize.  One by one they, along with the guys running the show, are picked off by the evil ghost, leading to a thrilling conclusion involving voodoo and mangled corpses.

Actors you may have seen in any other movie: None.

Number of other people in the theater: Four.

Best plot twist: At the last minute, one contestant is switched out for a porn star named Velvet Luv in order to boost ratings.  The entrepreneur promises her a bonus of $100 for every guy she fucks and $200 for every girl.

Number of other people who left during the first lesbian sex scene: Four.

Money racked up by Velvet Luv: $300.

Most awkward reoccuring subplot: The roid rage-filled offensive lineman who struggles with impotence for most of the movie before getting slipped some Viagra and boning Velvet Luv in the bathroom.

Most beat-into-the-ground mountaineering term that the writer used to attempt to add some semblance of authenticity to the movie: Cerebral Edema

Best line spoken by the ghost before killing a girl hand-cuffed to the bed and pinning her to the ceiling with an ice ax: "Where's your base camp?  Why won't you carry my bags!?!"

Number of different mountaineering tools used to murder people: 3 (ice ax, crampon, cam)

Most implausible moment: The last survivor is walking out the front door when the ghost throws a cam through her chest and pulls her back in.  For those of you unfamiliar with rock climbing, this is the wiki page on cams: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spring-loaded_camming_device.  They're not particularly... sharp.

Most disappointing realization upon looking the movie up on IMDb: The actress who plays Velvet Luv is not a real porn star.  We were really looking forward to linking you guys to her home page...

NEW FEATURE: Deeweedee of the Week!

This is an experiment, so I'd appreciate feedback on whether or not people like it.  Basically, we live next door to a movie theater that routinely plays American B-(or C- or D-)movies for about $1.40, so we have taken to attending some showings.  They are all just DVDs that the theater owner bought for $0.40 and he is turning a profit by selling one ticket, but that's okay.  You can sneak beer in with a backpack so it's worth it.  My plan is to write short plot summaries followed by a list of superlatives.  Here goes:

Title: The Hive

Plot Summary: An ant colony on a small island in the Pacific begins to attack and eat humans.  Leading experts are brought in but nobody seems to be able to control the ants.  Several battles ensue, but our hero soon discovers that the ants have actually become conscious.  They can form giant arms and other diverse figures (more on that to come).  They even link together and form a living computer (with each ant acting as a binary transmitter, yes for 1 or no for 0) and try to parlay with the humans.  They want half the island for themselves, and only when that happens will they leave the humans alone.  In the end, the ants all get blown up and the world is safe once again.

Actors you may have seen in any other movie: None.

Other people in the theater: Two.

Worst special effect:  The extermination rays used by the good guys that look a little worse than the ones in Ghostbusters (1984).

Most implausible moment: An ant crawls in a guy's ear and begins biting his neurons to affect his thinking and control him.

Best line spoken by the Prime Minister of the island while slamming his fist vehemently on a table:  "We will not negotiate with ants!"

Worst line trying to establish past love connection between two characters out of the blue: "Heh, I guess we're not backpacking around Europe anymore..."

Best special effect:  The climactic scene of the movie has the main characters fighting a giant ant...

Wait for it...

Made out of ants.

If any of you have a chance to catch this one, I would definitely recommend it.

-Jono and Sam